Standing in the wheelhouse talking about some of the things the Chief Mate has bought in Native villages in Alaska...

CM: I got some beaver slippers

Me: Nice. I think I'd like a hat...

CM: I got a spotted seal hat...it has beaver fur on the inside.

Me: I bet that's pretty warm...

CM: Beaver fur is really soft. SO soft.

*a little pause*

Me: Beaver fur is soft, huh? Like SO soft? *I proceed to crack up*

CM: Oh thank god you're laughing...I didn't think I could keep a straight face for one more second....

*thinks to myself: man, they have no idea how much time my mind sits in the gutter...*